☆✮ Excerpt ✮☆
A promise is a promise.
He always says the most positive things when I need to hear them. Lucca slides down the bed, kisses our tiny baby bump, and then places his cheek flat on my stomach while his fingers tenderly stroke my navel. My hands roam in his hair while my fingers twirl and entwine through his shaggy curls.
“Your mamma thinks she is the only one scared of being a parent. Well my little one, if Papa is honest, then so am I. I have never done this before either, and your mamma and I have a lot of learning to do together, so you need to be patient with us. I am sure your papa will get lots of things wrong. But Il mio piccolo, you need to know we both love you very much and we might make mistakes sometimes, but we love you unconditionally.”
He speaks very naturally to our small baby as if it’s already born; his hot breath whishing across my stomach causing sweet ripples deep inside me. It’s so lovable, honest, and cute that my heart almost jolts with a fast deep thud.
“To the moon and back,” I whisper with a smile repeating the words that my grandpa always says to me.
“To the moon and back,” he repeats.
“We both love you and cannot wait to meet you, but we are both scared Il mio piccolo. You need to be a good bambino for papa and let Mamma rest because she is feeling sick just now and I need to make sure Mamma feels better.” He places a lasting kiss on my tummy before sliding up the bed, leaning over me and taking my face in his hands.
Could I love this man anymore?
His words have touched me in a way that melts my heart and steals my breath. I never thought in a million years that Lucca would be nervous about being a parent. He has always appeared confident, assured, and he’s great with his nieces and nephews. Family is very important to him because he has such a big family of his own and I assumed because he’s been around kids that he knows what he’s doing. It’s refreshing to know he also questions his parenting skills to some extent. It eases some of my uncertainties to know it’s not just me who has doubts.
“You’re so sweet, Romeo. I love you. That was a really nice thing to say. I never thought you were even remotely nervous about being a daddy. I always thought because you wanted kids so badly that you would know what you’re doing and just take it in your stride,” I say stroking his shoulder and arm before kissing his shoulder.
“Si, I do want kids badly with you and I am looking forward to our next chapter together, but I also have my own worries and doubts about being a papa. I think most men do and do not like to admit it. My worries will be slightly different to yours because you are still feeling sick and you have emotional and hormonal things to consider, but I worry just the same. Please know you are doing a wonderful job of looking after our child and I know you question that, but trust me, you are doing just great.” He lies down on his side and wraps his arm around me, attentively stroking my hair.
“Thank you. I um … I just worry that my anxiety might cause the baby distress. I do think my worries would outnumber yours, Lucca, but it is kind of you to try and make me feel better. It’s different for a mother, it’s not just the pregnancy, it is everything that comes with pregnancy and afterwards, and this is me we are talking about,” I say blithely wrinkling my nose then chew the inside of my cheek. I really want to say, “this is me - a nervous broken mess of a woman.”
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☆✮ Playlist ✮☆
Listen to the Playlist here ➜ http://spoti.fi/1NjQ512
Mama Cass – Dream A Little Dream Of Me
Andrea Bocelli – Because We Believe
Michael Buble – Close Your Eyes
Micheal Buble – Feeling Good
Lara Fabien - Caruso
OMI– Cheerleader – Felix Jahen - The Remix
Jess Glynn – Hold My Hand
The Weeknd – Where You Belong
Rhianna – Skin
Hooverphonic – Mad About You
Beyonce – Drunken Love
Lifehouse – Hanging By A Moment
Keith Urban – Making Memories
Lifehouse – You And Me
Ed Sheeran – Thinking Out Loud
Captain and Tennille – Do That To Me One More Time
Lionel Ritchie – Truly
Ella James – At Last
Nat King Cole – Unforgettable
Nat King Cole – Smile
Nat King Cole – When I fall In Love
Coldplay – A Sky Full Of Stars
Alicia Keys – If I Aint Got You
Alicia Keys – That’s When I knew
Civil Wars – Barton Hollow
John Legends – All Of Me
Jessie J - Flashlight
The Proclaimers – I wouldn’t Walk 500 Miles
Auld Lang Syne
Runrig – Loch Lomand
☆✮ About the Author ✮☆
SJ Molloy, British Author of ‘The Luminara Series’ was born in Edinburgh, Scotland. As a young child, her family moved and raised her in Lanarkshire, Scotland where she currently resides with her husband, two daughters and her energetic, hyperactive loving gun dog who is utterly spoiled.
When she is not writing or reading, spending time with family and friends or exercising and walking her dog, SJ loves all things practical and creative. Dancing, music, cooking, travelling, good food and wine and painting are her favourite past times along with laughter, lots and lots of laughter.
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